This last week was particularly stressful and upsetting. I'm sure my hormones were out of whack, but events in multiple parts of my life made last week an unhappy one.
By Wednesday of last week I broke my Lenten abstinence from chocolate. Those Oreo cookies were calling to me, promising sweet relief from the stress and pain. After devouring them with the angriest face I could muster, I noted that guilt didn't seem to be raising its ugly head. A little shocked, I assumed that eventually I would feel downright horrible for eating chocolate during Lent. I'm not "hardcore" like the Eastern Orthodox who abstain from a lot more during Great Lent; yet I caved in to chocolate.
I had expected at least some kind of inner turmoil from eating the forbidden sweets. Nope. Could it have been anger and stress that granted me an indulgence? Possibly.
The episode certainly led me to realize just how comforting food is. I knew that when I was stressed I would crave certain foods: things fried, things sweet, things full of carbohydrates. After eating them, though, I noticed that I wasn't feeling relief or happiness or sorrowful delight. I just felt angry with a few crumbs of Oreo in my mustache.
Psalm 77
2 days ago
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3 comments:
I gave up refined sugar for Lent, and am actually really enjoying it. I give myself an allowance for Sundays sometimes, and for eating out socially. It is just too hard to avoid all sucrose at all times, y'know. But it has also got me thinking about eating healthier in general, and about choosing my sweet things carefully. I indulged in a double-double from Tim Hortons before we left Canada yesterday, and it was marvelous! (I also gave up skipping church, and that's going quite well too!)
I'm sorry you had a crappy week. Sugar always seems to offer succor, but it never lives up to its promises. Not even Oreos.
Well, great, now you're going to Hell, and all for a few oreos. ;)
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